"Even a month before Christmas, I would stand outside on the porch and look up at the sky - just in case Santa and his reindeer were out there flying around somewhere," she said, with the facial expressions of a young girl.

At 85, I wouldn't have thought of Lorraine Clawiter, of Des Moines, as having the face of a child. However, there was a certain innocent wonder and sparkle in her eyes that came back, when she talked of Christmas at Pig Springs and Mutton Hollow.

"I was an only child on a huge sheep ranch that was about 16 miles south of the Canadian border in Montana. Daddy was a school teacher and would ride up into the Bear Paw Mountains to all of the little school houses, so he was gone quite a bit.

"My mother, Jackie Hahnkamp, cooked for a sheep ranch of 30 shearers. So you see, I was always around adults and lived in my own make-believe world. There were no other kids to ruin the magic of Christmas. Santa was real to me." At this, Lorraine got misty-eyed, before she continued.

"Kids, of today, don't get to experience the excitement and innocent wonders of believing in Santa or the Easter Bunny or so many things." She went on, "You see, I knew that Santa was real, because we put out milk and cookies for him and they were always gone in the morning. However, even at five years old, I used to wonder how Mr. and Mrs. Santa Claus got so much done in one night."

"Right up until Christmas Eve we'd only have the tree out. It was strung with a popcorn-cranberry garland, some glass baubles and the little clip-on candles. But no presents were out, until Santa came and left them under the tree. It's a wonder more houses didn't burn down with those open flames from the candles!"

I asked Lorraine about the presents. She thought for a moment and then smiled, before answering. "Back then, the presents were never wrapped, but I never really thought about it. I guess I must have just figured that Santa wouldn't have had time with all of the houses he had to visit," she laughed. "I remember a very special, large doll-- I named her Rose June. And I got the most darling, little china dish set.
I believe it was called Lusterware. It was blue with orange and had little flowers on it - very darling and grown-up for such a little girl, but I was very grownup for my age."

Lorraine leaned forward, as if to tell a secret, and said that there were many times that she wanted to sneak downstairs to get a look at Santa, but she didn't dare, because he'd take off, without leaving the presents. I asked her what she saw, when they lowered the spring-recessed ladder and came down into the living room.

"Well, the cookies and milk were gone, so we all knew that he'd surely come. The doll was seated at my little table and chair set and the dishes were arranged on the table. And I believe there might have been a few little presents that were tucked in the boughs of the tree."

I asked her if she ever knew what she was going to get, in advance. "No. I might have hoped for something, but because we lived way out in the country and never went shopping, like they do, today, I never got to pick out anything specific. But Mom was always around me and pretty much knew what I needed or would want."

She sighed and went on. "Things have changed so much, with Moms working outside of the home, now. They're not able to have the close bond and relationship that we would have had, back then - it's sad. Us kids never thought about brand names or the money value of something. We were just grateful for whatever we got and it would have never crossed our minds to complain or return something."

I couldn't help but wonder when she found out that Santa wasn't real.

"Oh, I'll never forget that! We had gone into town. Back then, there was only one large department store, so there was only one Santa - and I got to see him! I was about eight and some kids, at school, were saying that Santa wasn't real. I was like a little bearcat and said, 'He is to, real. I saw him, myself, at the store!'

"They laughed at me and when I went home and told my parents, they fessed up and told me the truth about Santa and the Easter Bunny.
I remember feeling kind of embarrassed - like I'd been fooled. But I'm glad that I didn't know, for all of those years, because I got to believe in something that was so magical and sweet. It was such a wonderful period of time."

I knew it wouldn't be long before Lorraine teared up again, as her childhood memories were obviously very dear to her. She finished by saying, "I wish that the kids, of today, could experience what I did, as a child. Things have surely changed, haven't they?"

Now, it was my turn to tear up. Yes, times surely have changed, but what a blessing that there are still so many magical and sweet memories that can be shared. And, as I hunt around the community, looking for them, I would like to take this opportunity to wish you all a very blessed Christmas.

Des Moines resident Lee Ryan is an actor, creative writer and voice talent. She can be reached in care of hteditor@robinsonnews.com.