By Pat Cashman

Labor Day weekend is set up to honor the working people of this country. So far there is no national holiday honoring the shiftless do-nothings.

But for the occasionally shiftless do-nothing who writes this column, a big part of this holiday weekend is missing---and gone forever.

The Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystrophy Association (MDA) dropped their association with Lewis a couple of years ago---and this year dropped the TV telethon altogether. Sure the broadcast was sometimes tacky, tasteless and tawdry.

Maybe that’s why I miss it so much.

The ending of the MDA and Jerry Lewis relationship was like any other breakup---like Jennifer Lopez and Marc Antony or Lassie and Rin Tin Tin---the MDA and Jerry Lewis affair ended uglier than a warthog with measles.

If you ever saw Lewis in action on the telethon over the years, it’s easy to see why the end was inevitable. His sometimes boorish manner turned the annual telethon into a personal showcase for Jerry’s uncontrollable addiction to self-aggrandizement and shtick.

Maybe the Shtick Center could have helped him.

Regardless, my personal favorite all-time TV event of the year is history. Jerry Lewis is now making appearances at casinos---I saw him at the Emerald Queen Casino last year. Playing keno.
Actually, he appeared in a stage show billed as “Jerry Lewis in Concert” on the Casino’s main stage. A 21-piece orchestra played him on with a driving, brassy “Rock-A-Bye Your Baby With a Dixie Melody” ---his big hit from the 1950’s that reached number 10 on the charts.

The audience may have expected him to run out on stage jumping around, throwing cream pies---and yelling, “Oh, LADY!” But instead he shuffled out---slowly---like the fellow his late 80’s he now is.
He sang a couple of desultory songs early on, but that was about it for the “concert” part of the night. There were a few old jokes, but lots of forgotten punch lines. When audience members stepped up to an open mic for some Q and A, Jerry’s replies were often rude as he kept looking at his watch.

At precisely the two-hour mark, he said ‘good night’---as the band played him off in noisy, over-the-top style. The audience seemed to know that there was no use standing and applauding to encourage an encore. None was forthcoming.

A lot of paying customers were probably disappointed, but I wasn’t among them. Jerry may have been a shadow of his former self, but what an intriguing shadow.

Back in the early 1950’s as he cavorted on stage with then-partner Dean Martin, the duo was as big as it gets in show business---as big as Elvis. (The term ‘as big as Elvis’ has an unfortunate double-meaning to those who remember The King’s latter days.)

Picture the kind of audience mania that the Beatles created. THAT was how it was for Jerry Lewis back in the day---although his hair contained much more product than the Fab Four.

From Atlantic City’s 500 Club to the Copacabana to the London Palladium ---Jerry played them all---not to mention radio, TV and the movies. It was all part of his career path to the Emerald Queen.
But even after Lewis stopped appearing regularly in clubs and movies, you could always count on catching him on the annual telethon. But no more.

The old tote board is probably listed on Craig’s List.

His telethon tuxedos are now being worn by the waiters at El Gaucho.

There’s no longer any good treacly show biz schmaltz to be seen on TV during the Labor Day weekend---if you don’t count KING 5 Weekend Morning News.

But in my teens and early twenties, I was one of those people---one of perhaps seven nationwide---who stayed up the entire 21 and 1/2 hours of the telethon. This was made possible because I had no girlfriend.
The fundraising for MDA was a wonderful effort to be sure---but the TV show itself was riveting in a entirely different way. It was hours and hours of live, strangely compelling stuff and old-fashioned show biz types---at turns sentimental, then moving, then ridiculous. And Jerry’s demeanor ranged from caustic to syrupy; from hokey to ebullient. (I’ll have to look that last word up.)

But the more cloying or awkward it all got, the better I liked it. Plus in its heyday, you never knew which celebrity might show up---from John Lennon to the Jackson 5 to an obscure old-time Borscht Belt comic.
Frank Sinatra even showed up one year to surprise Jerry with a visit from his long estranged partner, Dean Martin.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbxLUs4Kako

Corny? Yes.
Gushy? Sure.
Bathetic? No doubt about it.
Jejune? Maybe. I’ll have to look that word up too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMX8yA3MAwc&list=PLB8806DB97796741F&ind…

pat@patcashman.com
Also can be seen on “the [206]” on KING 5---and on a weekly on-line show Peculiarpodcast.com