There is a new support group in town and it is believed to be the only one of its kind in the area.

Nar-Anon, which helps people reclaim their lives, is now officially in Burien.

The organizer of the Burien group, extending a personal welcome to the community, recently said, "I feel that God clearly led me to start a new group in our area for others like me who have been struggling with a loved one's addiction.

Nar-Anon operates from the principle that addiction is a family disease. Members share a strong bond from their common interest and concern.

The group meets every Wednesday at 6:30 p.m. at Highline Christian Church, 14859 First Ave. S.

Simply put, Nar-Anon participants learn how to detach from their addict- with love. The addict may be a child, spouse or significant other, parent, sibling, a friend, or someone else who has touched their hearts.

Those who care the most suffer from the erratic behavior of the addict. Nar-Anon helps their loved ones stay grounded in the present and concentrate on their own behaviors, thoughts and feelings.

Members effectively learn how to stop enabling the addict, by refusing to do things for them that they should do themselves. They also learn how to set boundaries.

At Nar-Anon, people are familiar with the behaviors of those who love an addict. They may have tried to ignore the situation. Or they have compensated by adjusting their lives, attitudes and personalities to the behaviors of the addicted person.

Even when the addict's moods changed drastically or there was trouble at school, work or with the law, these loved ones defended and protected them.

As the problem became clear, the loved ones commonly still attempted to ignore or deny it. They became frantic, and felt they were also being destroyed in the process.

At Nar-Anon, many participants have learned that their efforts to control or change the situation were actually enabling or encouraging this person to continue a self-destructive pattern. Often, it nearly destroyed the loved one.

At Nar-Anon meetings, guests meet other people who have loved their addicted someone with all of their hearts. It is their own behaviors that turned into obsession-worry about where the addict is, what he or she is doing, how they can control the drug usage.

Many have tried to control, cover-up, and lived in shame. Some became so addicted to the addict that it was difficult for them to shift the focus back to themselves.

Many have experienced the endless broken promises of the addict, and they became victims of denial.

It is not uncommon to meet a mother or father at a Nar-Anon meeting who spent years trying to change their son or daughter, and it nearly destroyed every good thing that came into their lives.

While many go to the meetings to change the behavior of the addict, they soon find it is their own thinking and attitude that must be changed if they are to have relief.

In Nar-Anon, people learn how to live one day at a time. They stop projecting. They learn how to deal with their feelings of fear, guilt, obsession, anxiety and denial.

They take a strong look inward and put their energy where they do have some power over the choices in their own lives. In doing this, the doors to hope open.

The worldwide fellowship of Nar-Anon is patterned after Al-Anon and is based on the 12-Step program. A community oriented group, it is a spiritual but not a religious group.

Meetings are free, and reading materials are available for less than a dollar. Everything associated with the meetings is held in strictest confidence, from the identity of participants to the discussion. Meetings are a safe place.

Even if guests don't want to talk, but only observe, it is okay. And they can come as they are because it is an informal group.

At Nar-Anon, they will meet friends who truly understand what they are experiencing, and they may leave with a powerful message of strength.

"Someone once said it is basically free therapy," said the Burien Nar-Anon organizer. "At these meetings, we can come and hear others share their experience, strength and hope.

"Nar-Anon has given me hope, and I am in a much better place today for having been involved with Nar-Anon. Nar-Anon is an answer to prayer for which I am very thankful."

The leader of the local group likes to imagine a future when 12-Step programs are incorporated into the schools.

In the meantime, this is a busy person who brings refreshments, sets up a table of varied Nar-Anon hand-outs and pours a heart into the organization-a lifeline to many-for each meeting.

As the Burien facilitator says, "The principles we learn can also be applied to other areas of our lives. We carry the message of hope by letting others know that they are not alone; by practicing the 12 Steps of Nar-Anon, and by changing our own attitudes."

The welcome mat is officially out. Expect some hugs, tears and hope.

Footnote: The Burien group acknowledged support and encouragement from the Kent Valley Nar-Anon group, which meets Thursdays at 8 p.m. at Trinity Community Church, 3807 Reith Rd.