School is starting again and for some of our readers this will mean that their children are off to "middle school." Caution, this is a major risk to your child!

I would like to offer some serious advice about this most important time in your children's lives.

You probably have already been invited to a evening session where the Principal, well meaning, will exude excitement about the possibilities for your child in this coming year. The Principal is well meaning and is correct that some of the "possibilities" suggested could happen.

Principals probably will not mention the fact that this is the age at which many kids begin a path that does not lead to the positive outcomes that parents would like to think about.

Parents and kids seem to believe that middle school is a time where they should begin to part their ways and make decisions without consultation.

If you feel that your child is mature enough for this, let me suggest that you fatten up your checkbook, and then make them the sole authorized signature.

Any takers? I don't think that I can find many takers, but some of the decisions that your children, at ages 12-15, are likely to make will cost you even more than your checkbook.

The odds of completing middle school successfully in Federal Way are about 1 in 3, if we measure this by the success rates of our high schools in graduating kids who are either prepared for college or have desirable employment skills.

There is almost no evidence to suggest that an unsatisfactory experience in middle school can be rectified in high school.

Let me offer you some suggestions for how to beat these odds.

In fact I can almost guarantee that if you follow these suggestions your child will stand an excellent chance of garnering a full ride scholarship to college or whatever other field of endeavor that they make wish to enter.

They may, however, not become homecoming king or queen.

1. Let's start with the bedroom.

This should be a place for two activities only. Sleeping and studying. It should not be a "communications center." Remove the television, computer, telephone and all electronic games/devices from this room and insist that they remain out of this room!

2. Dress.

Look at the dress of your children as a statement of your values. If you believe that provocative clothing is your lifestyle, then so be it. If you believe that appropriate dress is a statement of lifestyle, make sure that your children show it. There is something to the expression "dress for success."

3. Cell phones.

If you really believe that you must have communication with your child get them one that allows that, and only that! No text messaging, no cameras, no web access, etc. A recent study found that we are doing over 7 hours of "communication" daily, and I can assure you that the text messaging your child will be doing will have little to do with knowledge acquisition.

4. Monitor your child's access to computers, etc.

Computers, cell phones, television and other electronic devices should be stationed in the family room where there is appropriate monitoring of their use. Cell phones should be turned off upon entry into the house, and placed on a charger where you can be sure that they remain while at home.

5. Get your kids to read.

Subscribe to a newspaper and a weekly news magazine and insist that your child read one article a day and discuss this with you at the dinner table. If your child expresses an interest in any particular activity, get them a subscription to a relevant commercial/trade publication.

6. I-Pods and I-Phones.

In spite of what many may say these have no place in a school setting. Anytime spent on these in school will be time that they are not paying attention. If your child has any of these be sure that you know where they are when they leave for school. They should remain at home!

7. Breakfast and Dinner.

Insist that your child eat with you and discuss their lives every weekday. There is an alarming trend in our society, as suggested in "The Dumbest Generation," for children to have little or no communication with adults. This leads to some very dramatic knowledge gaps.

8. Homework.

In spite of denials there should be some of this for review every weekday evening. If not get in touch with the school.

9. Athletics and other activities.

If there are any grades less than a "B," your child has given you evidence that they do not have the time for both studies and these activities. Insist that they cease these activities until they rectify the achievement issues.

10. Independent assessments.

What evidence to you have that your child is doing well other than the report card? There are several other national tests, such as the "Plus" test and ACT tests that will let you know the real strengths and weaknesses of your child. Do not rely on local assessments. Alberta has an online test for 6th graders available. I can provide the address to those who are interested.

Will your kids object to this? You bet they will!

Does this make it any less necessary? I don't think so.

It is your responsibility to raise your children, not the school's.

Unfortunately a recent poll showed that most parents were more concerned about their children being "satisfied" with school, than achieving in school. This plan flies directly in the path of this. Remember Yogi Bear's famous motto! "I am smarter than the average bear!" This is what it takes. One only has to look at "Are you smarter than a 5th grader," or "Jaywalking" to confirm that there are some pretty dumb bears in the forest.

Charlie Hoff is a former member of the Boarwd of Education for Federal Way Public Schools. His weekly column will appear in upcoming issues of the Federal Way News and online at www.federalwaynews.net.