Perhaps the best part of the Christmas season at our family gathering is when we sing a few old carols around the fire. It starts with one of the more courageous of our extended family, Aunt Gert, who has a fine voice, made even better by a few glasses of nog. She lays in to 'Up on the Rooftop' and pretty soon the rest of us join in and we rollick our way through six or eight tunes until no one can remember the words anymore.

This year for Christmas, somebody gave me a mini-lecture recorder (thanks Uncle Wally) and I guess I accidentally sat on it, because when I turned it on today I heard what sounded like a cat who sat too close to the rocking chair, but then I realized it was just the family singing those familiar carols.

My brother, Ferd, was the loudest, at first:

Good King Wences' car backed out

On the feet of heathens

When the snores came all about

Deep as biscuits, even.

Brightly shone the traffic light

'Til he hit a mu-le

Then the p'liceman came in sight

He felt like a foo-ool.

Then, my little niece, Rubella hit some high notes:

We free kings of Oregon are

Tried to light a rubber cigar... It was loaded, it exploded, covering them with tar...

And then Grand Dad must've sat nearby,

Good king wants his applesauce

At the feast this evening

Don't forget that he's the boss

And he don't like teasin'.

Make sure there's a side of pork

Sure to keep him happy

We all know he's still a dork

And he wears a na-aa-ppy

This one seemed to make everyone happy, because the next tune was

a rousing Jingle Bells, I think.

Oh... jingle bells, Batman smells

Robin laid an egg

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a wrecked up Chevrolet - hey

Jingle bells, jingle bells

Jingle all the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

with an old horse, soap and sleigh

My cousin Percival, the quiet one, stood up and offered his rendition of this solemn standard,

Silent night, holy night;

All is calm, all is bright.

Round John Virgin, margarine child;

Holey flintlock, sewed tender and mild.

Sleep in heavenly peas;

Slee-eep in heavenly peas..

Then the whole group chimed in with what sounded like 'Winter Wonderland, but I could only make out about half of it:

In the meadow we can build a snowman;

Then pretend that he is sparse and brown.

He'll say, "Are you married?"

We'll say, "No, man!

Until the alligators knock him down!"

Later on... we'll perspire

As we drink... by the fire

To face, I'm afraid,

The plans that we made

Walkin' in a winter wonderland

The batteries started running low by the time I typed up the rest of these fractured Christmas carols, but I think I heard a couple more titles like,

"Deck the halls with Buddy Holly..."

And, "On the first day of Christmas my TULIP gave to me..."

Happy New Year to you and yours.