Lately, I have been thinking a lot about choices I made a choice nine years ago, and I certainly have had plenty of time to think about it since then.

That was when I left my (extremely) cushy federal job to work from home here on the island.

Why? Maybe it was the third child coming along. Maybe it was the commute from my home on Vashon. It could be because I saw the kids growing up way too quickly.

Whatever the reason, though, I made the choice. I vividly recall talking to a friend of mine then. Here I was, a pretty progressive (code for liberal) mom, ready to give up the big career to be home.

And make no mistake, it was a big career. I started as a radio reporter, worked as a Congressional press secretary, and managed plenty of folks and emergencies in a high-level federal public affairs job. My career was pretty much how I defined myself.

Anyway, I was talking to this friend of mine, a high-profile Republican in Seattle, in late 2000, and this is what he said to me: "Why is it that Democrats seem to think it is a partisan issue to say that kids should have a parent home with them? Why do they need to react so strongly to that idea? It should be a bi-partisan issue."

I remember I bristled, the feminist in me cringing. I had fought that kind of thinking for five years of parenting, and my reaction was instinctual.

But then I stopped and said in wonder, "You know, I think you are right."

Now I can hear some of my feminist friends bristling now-- me daring to think it could be better for kids to have a parent home. But I have to tell you, after doing it for nine years I think I believe it.

In these years, I have been able to coach basketball and fast pitch teams. I have been able to lead a Camp Fire group. I have been on boards, run auctions, and volunteered in classrooms.

Perhaps, most importantly to me, I have been able to sing with my kids. That's a hobby I hadn't touched in 15 years.

Now those things, rather than my job, define me. So here I am, nine years later, making moms bristle, by saying it might be best that I was here all this time.

But I will say at the same time, something that makes me bristle and it is this thought: What happened to my career?

Now, as I look back over the last nine years, I see an endless array of hustling for work. There were clients I chased; magic I worked to pay the bills. There was stress and tension and difficult work I had to do. There were months when payments were late.

And, when all was said and done, my career didn't define me. I just did it to pay the bills.

Now, I am ready to go back. The recession has hit small businesses hard, and mine is no different. So the time was right to re-enter.

I announced with great hue and cry, "Ta da, here I am!" But everything has changed. The world has moved on. Recession lingers. So finding a job? Not so easy.

Everywhere I go I hear this story. Women who gave up their careers to be home, coach teams, run groups and go on field trips have all decided to go back and jumpstart their careers, and the re-entry is very hard indeed.

I have been wondering a lot about this choice lately. Do I regret it?

Asked in 2010, I say the answer is yes. I regret the worry and I regret looking for work and swallowing my pride. I know intellectually that we women make these choices and are glad we did. But I think that gladness will come later in my life.

I see these women everywhere as I search for a job. The bank, the athletic club, the store. I am there, and I find myself talking about this change.

Every woman has her own story to tell. She was a big marketing expert who now works a register. She was a banking exec and now staffs a front office.

You name it; the women have their stories. We are a society, a band of women who pull together and say "You go, girl!" We tell each other we can do it. We can find those jobs and survive these scary times. We support each other, comfort each other; look to better days.

I believe this gang of women who made that choice could even be heroes. But society doesn't see it that way.

I keep thinking of my father-in-law. He worked his whole life. He hardly saw his kids. One day, I asked him what he would do differently as a dad, if anything. He told me he wished he would have slowed down more, spent more time with his kids.

As he said, 'No one on their deathbed ever says they wished they would have worked more."

I understand that now, quite profoundly. I am sure I will feel the same someday.

But today? Today I salute the women (and men) who make the choice my family did nine years ago. It's a tough choice. I believe it was good for my family.

Was it good for me? I will need some distance - and a job -- before I answer that question.

Lauri Hennessey runs her own public relations freelance business and will hopefully be re-entering the full-time workforce soon after you read this. You can reach her at lauri@hennesseypr.com.